So I’m going off for a silent meditation retreat and a little vacation on either end in N’ton, so I hope to see some of you guys at Spacecrime this weekend! I’ll be checking this journal sporadically, but email, as always when I’m up there, is probably a wash for the next 21 days.


Susan’s wedding

I have to say, of all the weddings I’ve gone to, it’s the couples who have overcome the most who have the most beautiful ceremonies.

I grew up in a very loving home, but my parents had been married for more than a decade before they started having kids, which meant I never had a sense of their early struggles to compromise with each other and deepen their relationship. But watching Susan and John over the past five years, they’ve taught me so much of how to create a deep, loving, healthy relationship. Looking at them, I really understand what love is.

Susan looked like a fairy-tale princess in her gown, too beautiful for words. It was strange; she’s usually very casual, so seeing her poised and perfect was an odd and lovely experience.

One of John’s coworkers volunteered his apartment as a staging area where people could wait out the rain, and both he and his wife were unbelievably generous with their hospitality. The rain let up just in time for the ceremony; everything went so well.

I’d never been to a non-Jewish wedding before, so I was really fascinated by what a Christian ceremony could bring to bear on the act of committing to another person that was different from my own tradition. John’s aunt, Pixie, who is an ordained minister, did a beautiful ceremony using a lovely translation of First Corinthians: “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as a sounding brass, or a crashing cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could move mountains, and have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long, and is kind; love envies not; love vaunts not itself, is not puffed up, does not behave itself unseemly, seeks not her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil; rejoices not in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things… And now abides faith, hope and love; but the greatest of these is love.”

And Susan and John’s vows to each other were so beautiful and so personal that pretty much everyone there was in tears.

The reception was incredibly lavish; hundreds of people were there, including Bardians I hadn’t seen in years, like Sandy Kalm and Matt. So wonderful to see them again, and Sandy’s in really good places right now, so it was wonderful to hear what’s doing with her. And despite the fact that I can’t dance, since Susan was sad that the dance floor was empty, I grabbed Sandy and just started boogeying down until other people got up the nerve and joined in. Gladdening the bride is fun. 🙂 And it being a Chinese wedding, it was apparently traditional to have more than a dozen courses, each deliciously made. I was actually glad that some included shellfish so I could say no to them, or I would have burst out of my gown!

All in all, an amazing event, and hopefully an omen of much joy to come for them.